Ficlet: Bright Isn’t Always Beautiful
May. 30th, 2025 06:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
badly_knittedTitle: Bright Isn’t Always Beautiful
Author:
badly_knittedCharacters: Ianto, Jack.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 560
Spoilers: Nada.
Summary: Ianto has fallen victim to another faulty piece of alien tech, and he’s not happy about it.
Written For: The prompt ‘Any, any, yellow’, at
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threesentenceficathon.Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.
Torchwood had it in for him, Ianto just KNEW it! He wasn’t the only one who suffered weird mishaps, that was one of the occupational hazards that went with the job, he just seemed to be the one who suffered the worst and the weirdest, not to mention the most unsightly and undignified. Every time the fates got bored, he could swear they gathered together and said, “Ooh, let’s mess with Ianto again! See how miserable we can make him this time, that’s always good for a laugh!” And once again, what little dignity he had left went flying right out the metaphorical window.
He was so done with being the go-to victim of the universe’s practical jokes, but no matter how careful he was, he couldn’t seem to avoid them, so here he was again… Bugger it! Now he would have to face the others looking like… THIS! Pulling himself together as best he could, he steeled himself against the inevitable laughter and jokes from his colleagues, and went to see what could be done to fix his appearance.
OoOoOoO
“My hair is NOT supposed to be yellow,” Ianto insisted, looking seriously annoyed, as well he might. “It’s not even blond, which would be bad enough, it’s bright yellow, makes me look like a bloody canary!”
“Or a sunflower,” Jack pointed out, but it was clear the moment the words left his mouth that his observation was not appreciated in the slightest, and from the expression on his lover’s face, he had a sinking feeling that he might just have earned himself a punishment of cheap instant decaf in place of Ianto’s sublime coffee blends. The thought made him shudder, and he couldn’t help feeling it would be more than a little unfair in he did get punished, because Ianto’s new hair colour was nothing to do with him, he wasn’t even there when it happened.
But Ianto overlooked his verbal slip for the moment; he hadn’t finished complaining…
“It clashes with my shirt, and it’s not just the hair on my head either…” which even Jack could see was true, because Ianto’s eyebrows and eyelashes were canary yellow, and his stubble was coming through yellowish too, and then it hit Jack that Ianto wasn’t talking about that at all, and it was all he could do not to burst out laughing at the thought of Ianto with bright yellow chest hair and, well, lower. He had to bite his lip to keep himself under control, hard enough that he could taste blood, and that sobered him up a little. Not much, but enough that he could try to console Ianto in his hour of need.
“There’s nothing to worry about, Ianto; you’ve been through worse, and we’ve always sorted you out. We’ll fix you this time as well, or Tosh will; you know she’s a genius with alien tech.” He probably should have stopped there, but once his mouth started working, sometimes it just kept on going without his conscious control… “And look on the bright side, if worse comes to worst, there’s always hair dye and waxing, a touch of mascara on your eyelashes…” He trailed off, wishing he could take his last words back.
Ianto turned an icy glare on him and actually growled.
Jack winced. Yep, he was definitely getting the cheap instant decaf punishment now.
The End
He was so done with being the go-to victim of the universe’s practical jokes, but no matter how careful he was, he couldn’t seem to avoid them, so here he was again… Bugger it! Now he would have to face the others looking like… THIS! Pulling himself together as best he could, he steeled himself against the inevitable laughter and jokes from his colleagues, and went to see what could be done to fix his appearance.
OoOoOoO
“My hair is NOT supposed to be yellow,” Ianto insisted, looking seriously annoyed, as well he might. “It’s not even blond, which would be bad enough, it’s bright yellow, makes me look like a bloody canary!”
“Or a sunflower,” Jack pointed out, but it was clear the moment the words left his mouth that his observation was not appreciated in the slightest, and from the expression on his lover’s face, he had a sinking feeling that he might just have earned himself a punishment of cheap instant decaf in place of Ianto’s sublime coffee blends. The thought made him shudder, and he couldn’t help feeling it would be more than a little unfair in he did get punished, because Ianto’s new hair colour was nothing to do with him, he wasn’t even there when it happened.
But Ianto overlooked his verbal slip for the moment; he hadn’t finished complaining…
“It clashes with my shirt, and it’s not just the hair on my head either…” which even Jack could see was true, because Ianto’s eyebrows and eyelashes were canary yellow, and his stubble was coming through yellowish too, and then it hit Jack that Ianto wasn’t talking about that at all, and it was all he could do not to burst out laughing at the thought of Ianto with bright yellow chest hair and, well, lower. He had to bite his lip to keep himself under control, hard enough that he could taste blood, and that sobered him up a little. Not much, but enough that he could try to console Ianto in his hour of need.
“There’s nothing to worry about, Ianto; you’ve been through worse, and we’ve always sorted you out. We’ll fix you this time as well, or Tosh will; you know she’s a genius with alien tech.” He probably should have stopped there, but once his mouth started working, sometimes it just kept on going without his conscious control… “And look on the bright side, if worse comes to worst, there’s always hair dye and waxing, a touch of mascara on your eyelashes…” He trailed off, wishing he could take his last words back.
Ianto turned an icy glare on him and actually growled.
Jack winced. Yep, he was definitely getting the cheap instant decaf punishment now.
The End
