Ficlet: Punishment
Feb. 23rd, 2026 05:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
badly_knittedTitle: Punishment
Author:
badly_knittedCharacters: Ianto, Jack, Lisa.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 610
Spoilers: Cyberwoman.
Summary: Ianto knows he doesn’t deserve a second chance after everything he did trying to save Lisa, but Jack has granted him one anyway.
Written For: The prompt ‘Any, any, being given a second chance’, at
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threesentenceficathon.Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.
Ianto knew full well that Jack would be within his rights to Retcon him, or even execute him, that being Torchwood One’s standard method of dealing with anyone perceived to be a traitor to Torchwood and the crown. Surely harbouring a partially converted Cyberwoman within Torchwood Three’s base, thereby putting the entire world at risk of being converted, must count as treason, regardless of the fact that what motivated him was love rather than dreams of power or conquest.
And yet, despite his grave error of judgement, his stupidity and naivety, even despite Jack’s own very understandable anger, and his justified sense of betrayal, Ianto was still alive. Not only that, but he still had all his memories intact, which was both a blessing and a curse. As much as he didn’t want to forget Lisa, couldn’t bear the thought of having their time together, the love they’d shared for the past two and a half years, erased from his mind, he wasn’t sure he wanted to remember what she had become at the end, or the lengths he’d gone to, the things he’d done, in his misguided efforts to keep her alive.
He had no choice in the matter though, because Jack had granted him a second chance, and was allowing him not just to live, but to continue working for Torchwood. As much as that was an unexpected kindness, one he was sure he didn’t deserve, he knew it was also his punishment. He would have to work every day among the people he’d betrayed, and to remember every detail of what his blind devotion to the woman he’d loved had caused. That included the deaths of two people, one a completely innocent pizza delivery girl, and the other a brilliant scientist who might, someday, have done a lot of good with his expertise in cybernetics.
Looking back, Ianto realised he should have let Lisa go, ended her life as painlessly as he could, when there had still been enough of her left to reason with. No, that was wrong; he should have done it when he first found her, when she was begging him to kill her, before she changed her mind and started pleading with him to help her instead.
At the time, he’d just thought she was out of her mind with fear and pain, didn’t know what she was saying, but with the benefit of hindsight, knowing what he knew now… Lisa had been the one begging him to end her suffering. The one asking him for help had been the cyberman, manipulating him, using Lisa’s voice and memories against him, and he’d fallen for the lies, believed the deception. He’d been worse than a fool.
He couldn’t turn back time and undo all the mistakes he’d made, no matter how much he might wish he could. The only thing Ianto could do was live with what he’d done. It would take him a long time, perhaps the rest of his life, to make amends for his crimes, if it was even possible, but he owed it to Jack and the team, and especially to Lisa’s two victims, to do the best he could.
He didn’t expect to be forgiven anytime soon, perhaps not ever, but that didn’t matter; he didn’t deserve forgiveness anyway, and he doubted he could accept it in the unlikely event of it being offered. No, all he wanted was to do his job to the best of his ability. His penance would be to follow orders to the letter, and to ensure that Torchwood Three ran as smoothly as humanly possible. It was the least he owed his colleagues.
The End
And yet, despite his grave error of judgement, his stupidity and naivety, even despite Jack’s own very understandable anger, and his justified sense of betrayal, Ianto was still alive. Not only that, but he still had all his memories intact, which was both a blessing and a curse. As much as he didn’t want to forget Lisa, couldn’t bear the thought of having their time together, the love they’d shared for the past two and a half years, erased from his mind, he wasn’t sure he wanted to remember what she had become at the end, or the lengths he’d gone to, the things he’d done, in his misguided efforts to keep her alive.
He had no choice in the matter though, because Jack had granted him a second chance, and was allowing him not just to live, but to continue working for Torchwood. As much as that was an unexpected kindness, one he was sure he didn’t deserve, he knew it was also his punishment. He would have to work every day among the people he’d betrayed, and to remember every detail of what his blind devotion to the woman he’d loved had caused. That included the deaths of two people, one a completely innocent pizza delivery girl, and the other a brilliant scientist who might, someday, have done a lot of good with his expertise in cybernetics.
Looking back, Ianto realised he should have let Lisa go, ended her life as painlessly as he could, when there had still been enough of her left to reason with. No, that was wrong; he should have done it when he first found her, when she was begging him to kill her, before she changed her mind and started pleading with him to help her instead.
At the time, he’d just thought she was out of her mind with fear and pain, didn’t know what she was saying, but with the benefit of hindsight, knowing what he knew now… Lisa had been the one begging him to end her suffering. The one asking him for help had been the cyberman, manipulating him, using Lisa’s voice and memories against him, and he’d fallen for the lies, believed the deception. He’d been worse than a fool.
He couldn’t turn back time and undo all the mistakes he’d made, no matter how much he might wish he could. The only thing Ianto could do was live with what he’d done. It would take him a long time, perhaps the rest of his life, to make amends for his crimes, if it was even possible, but he owed it to Jack and the team, and especially to Lisa’s two victims, to do the best he could.
He didn’t expect to be forgiven anytime soon, perhaps not ever, but that didn’t matter; he didn’t deserve forgiveness anyway, and he doubted he could accept it in the unlikely event of it being offered. No, all he wanted was to do his job to the best of his ability. His penance would be to follow orders to the letter, and to ensure that Torchwood Three ran as smoothly as humanly possible. It was the least he owed his colleagues.
The End
